2 Samuel 18

Absalom Falls Hard

1 David did a headcount and put his crew in squads, commanders over thousands and hundreds.

2 He split the army into three groups: Joab led one, Joab’s brother Abishai led another, and Ittai the Gittite had the third. David said, “I am rolling with you all too.”

3 But the people said, “Nah, you stay back. If we run or die, they will not care. But if you die, it is over. You are worth ten thousand of us.”

4 David said, “Alright. I will do whatever you all think is best.” He stood at the gate and watched them roll out by the hundreds and thousands.

5 Before they left, David told Joab, Abishai, and Ittai, “Be gentle with my son Absalom, for my sake.” Everyone heard the order.

The Battle Begins

6 The army met Israel’s forces in the forest of Ephraim.

7 David’s crew laid them out. Twenty thousand fell that day.

8 The battle was wild and spread out through the woods. More men died from the forest itself than by the sword.

Absalom Gets Caught

9 Absalom was riding his mule when he ran up on David’s men. As he passed under a big oak tree, his hair got snatched in the branches. His mule kept going, and he was left hanging in midair.

10 One of the soldiers saw it and told Joab, “Listen, I saw Absalom hanging in a tree!”

11 Joab said, “You saw him, Why did you not drop him right there, I would have given you silver and a warrior’s belt.”

12 The man said, “Even for a thousand pieces of silver, I would not touch him. The king said, ‘Do not harm my son.’ I heard it, and so did you.”

13 “If I had done it, and the king found out, you would not back me up.”

14 Joab said, “I am not waiting on this.” He took three javelins and drove them into Absalom’s chest while he was still hanging in the tree.

15 Then ten of Joab’s armor bearers circled and finished him off.

Absalom Buried

16 Joab blew the horn, the army stopped chasing. Battle over.

17 They tossed Absalom’s body into a big pit in the forest and stacked rocks over it. Meanwhile, Israel’s troops ran home.

18 Back when Absalom was alive, he had built a monument to himself in the King’s Valley, saying, “I do not have any son to carry my name.” So he named the pillar after himself, still called Absalom’s Monument today.

David Gets the News

19 Ahimaaz said to Joab, “Let me run and tell the king the Lord gave him the win.”

20 Joab said, “Not today. You are not the one to tell him his son is dead.”

21 Then Joab told a Cushite, “Go tell the king what you saw.” So the Cushite ran.

22 Ahimaaz still begged Joab, “Please let me run too!” Joab said, “Why, You will not get a reward for this.”

23 Ahimaaz said, “I am running anyway.” Joab said, “Fine, run.” So Ahimaaz took the back road and outran the Cushite.

The King Waits

24 David was sitting between the gates. The watchman looked up and saw someone running alone.

25 He shouted down. The king said, “If he is alone, it is good news.”

26 Then he saw another runner. The watchman said, “Here comes another one!” The king said, “Must be good news too.”

27 The watchman said, “That first one runs like Ahimaaz.” The king said, “He is a good man, he must have good news.”

The First Report

28 Ahimaaz ran up and said, “Peace, king!” He bowed low and said, “The Lord gave us victory!”

29 The king asked, “Is my son Absalom safe?” Ahimaaz said, “I saw some confusion when Joab sent me, but I do not know what happened.”

30 The king said, “Step aside.” So he did.

The Truth Hits

31 Then the Cushite showed up and said, “Good news, my king! The Lord gave you victory today!”

32 The king asked, “Is my son Absalom safe?” The Cushite said, “May all your enemies end up like that man.”

A Father’s Pain

33 The king broke down. He went to his room crying out, “Oh my son Absalom! My son, my son Absalom! I wish I had died instead of you!”